Shifting

I sit in a place of in between. No longer attached to the past; not yet ready for the new. Patiently waiting for what, I do not know. All the old structures have crumbled, no longer able to sustain themselves. Everything I thought I was, revealed as illusion. Where do I go to next?  I feel like I am in a state of life between lives. That place after death: the waiting room; waiting to take on the next role.

A strange situation it is, too. I am here, but at the same time not here. Part of this place, but also strangely removed from it. Family and friends gone, disappeared as though they never existed. It’s as though I have been picked up and placed in another setting, another play. A play not yet revealed. It’s not a scary place, but a strange place; like I’m in a foreign world observing the natives, trying to grasp their language, their rules for life, even. I feel like an intruder, as if I don’t belong; which I no longer do.

I’m not who I was, but as yet not who I am.

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Point of Reference

In life, most people are guided by something… perhaps a God, an idea, a belief, or a relationship. In all of these, there are rules to learn and to abide by and there are languages to help us understand the game of life. These things are our safety net, they are what we define ourselves by. Should we act outside of these rules, we may fear being alienated, cast out and alone!

We get to know ourselves firstly through our parents/carers, then our siblings, larger family and to the general population. We join groups, sports teams,  organisations, protests and marches. We fight causes that call to us even if we do not know why and we align ourselves to political parties. We live with material success and the need for approval of others. For the most part, we feel a sense of connectedness, of belonging and unity. We get a sense that this is ‘us’, this is what life is all about. All is good.

But what happens when you find yourself without these groups of people, successes, material gain or causes to align with? What do you do when the world has been pulled from right under your feet? Where is that sense of connectedness you felt to those you believed in? Where is that connection if your God is not what you thought it to be, if the ideology you followed turns out to be an illusion? You realise that no matter what you believed, felt, knew or connected to is no longer there. You are adrift without oars or a compass, being carried along without a north star to guide you. What do you do, who do you turn to if there is no one, no thing to turn? 

Can you trust yourself to be your guide? Do you really believe what you know, feel, see or hear as your own truth? Do you trust in your own innate being enough to guide you on? And if you did, what would you be heading towards if all you knew had gone? No goals to follow, no dreams to dream, no place to run or hide. Where would you see yourself ending up?

This is where we need a new reference point, that reference point US (I). A reference point we set ourselves, one that can NEVER be lost. When our frame of reference is set at US – which is and has always been then  never again can we be cast adrift in a sea of lonliness or false living.

It is said that we come back to the very same place we began. We come back to US!!!

I therefore, must be our frame of reference, our starting point, our guide in life and in death. I, is always with us, even when in disguise. If we use this as our guide, then we can know that we will never be separate, can never be alone even when outside of us the world may be falling apart!

Death is All Around Me

Death is all around me

Death is all around me I sense its timely entrance.
Be away with the old, the rotten and the stale
Be away with the stench of all so fowl.
I am that death, it resides in me
I am that death and the I
That I was, has ceased to be.
I have evolved like the caterpillar
Into the butterfly,
I spread my wings with joy and fly.
I fly to another place
Where i become we
And we are but one face.
I fly to another world
So different from this
No longer trapped
I feel the winds kiss.
I am free to dance and to sing,
I make up my life
On the prayer of a wing.

(Author: Jacqueline Cullen)

Becoming a Modern Nomad

I am a restless soul. Every moment of every day of my life must count for something, mean something, or I get very restless. I need to be where I am needed most; where I am nourished most. It’s a great big world out there. Why settle in one spot, decay and rot, in the name of putting down roots? We’re not trees. Humans have legs that are made for walking.

It took me many, many years to accept my nomadic self. The excuse to move has always been for work experience, a career move, more affordable cost of living. The truth is, my feet itch, my spirit yearns for renewal of Self, of fresh eyes, new perspectives, greater awareness, expanded possibilities. The traditional: own a home, have a family, get the latest devices everyone else has, while ‘nice’, has never been a motivation for me. In fact, once I acquire a certain amount of material possessions, there is a point at which it feels so burdensome, I need to get rid of it entirely. This is true to some degree of places I live, and even people (if they are stagnant in their own lives).

I used to be hard on myself about this. Like, it’s wrong. Like, I should be settled and own a home at my age. I should stick with my job because who’s going to give me another when fresh blood is so bountiful? But, this is my life, and I’m going to do it my way, and the consequences may not actually be so bad from my point of view. To some, the worst thing in the world may be to have nothing. But imagine the freedom!

The tribal way was nomadic. If a place no longer served, the community got up and shifted elsewhere. At a time when there were no borders, where instincts and intuition were followed, when shamans led and the people trusted, this is the innate natural behaviour of the human being on earth. Modern society is so fixated on ownership, on insurance, on legal boundaries – all oppressive fear-inducing tactics – resulting in depression, stuckness, and suicide (of spirit, if not body). For me, this kind of life is something I no longer accept.

It wasn’t until I fully accepted the possibility that I could become homeless, penniless, jobless and wind up with nothing – that I could begin to let go of all my possessions to free myself entirely of their responsibility, so I could be true to the wandering spirit that I am and live as a modern nomad. It is getting to a place of Fearlessness of the Unknown.

As I shed the excess baggage I’ve accumulated, I remain open to any and all possibilities that come my way. Open to learning, being, becoming, evolving.

Is there any other way to live? For me, this is the best way to live!

Becoming a Modern Nomad © March 16, 2011 | Annie Zalezsak

Telling the Story of Personal Evolution

Tiny steps.
Ripple effect.
Bravo!
It is all evolving… we are all evolving, at different paces.

Patience.

Telling the Story of Personal Evolution © March 5, 2011 | Annie Zalezsak

New Beginnings

The Clarity Tribe has been on a Journey of ever-growing magnitude. It began on an airplane to Faro. It intensified throughout a week in Praia da Rocha. It now continues to unfold in Portugal and the United Kingdom.

We have truly left behind past pathways and venture now into new paradigms.

Come join us.