Running in Circles

Photo credit: Fuzzybearphoto, Dreamstime.com

I frequently find myself running in circles. No matter how fast I run, or how hard I try, when I get to the finish line, I find myself straight back at the starting line, poised to re-enter the race.

It’s like a perpetual Groundhog Day (see the film trailer). I go through the motions with apathy, and expect things to change. They don’t. So I get up the next morning and do the same, with maybe just a tiny tweak. I still find myself arriving where I started. I get frustrated. It becomes a puzzle, not unlike a Rubik’s cube.

What haven’t I noticed? What isn’t lining up yet?

No matter how much energy I expend, no matter how much I analyze, very little changes. I just keep running in these darn circles, praying for a miracle, a way out, a hand up, a spring forward. It mocks me, knowing it has me trapped in its maze.

Then I remember. Live in the moment. Relax, enjoy the scenery, even if it is for the umpteenth time — I’ll pretend it is the first time. I stay open to seeing anything new, anything I may have missed before. I look at it from different angles; scan the sights high, low, backwards, up, down and around. Again and again, in playful awareness, like a baby observing its new world from outside the womb.

The Universe has a way of moving us along to the next stage of the game of life, exactly when we’re ready and meant to be there. Let’s enjoy the now. Smell the roses. Let’s keep in motion, but make it a relaxed, gentle, observant pace. Let’s stop analyzing and chasing, because we’ll only be running in circles.

Running in Circles © June 19, 2011 | Annie Zalezsak

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Lazy Days

The last week or so has been full of activity. My mind has been whirring away, full of ideas about the next thing on the path of my life. I’ve been making contacts, revising websites, developing pages, sending out CVs; basically staying up all night doing anything and everything I can think of to generate some action for my future.

Many of us feel guilty taking time out. Like the world will stop spinning if we don’t keep going at some (albeit fruitless) activity. So we drive ourselves onward, even if it’s wasted energy.

Now, I do believe everyone should have at least one Lazy Day per week. A lazy day is when you don’t do anything much in particular. You can catch up on chatting with friends, or read a good book. You can watch TV or nap all day. It’s doing whatever you want and feel like doing, but it’s centred around rest, or moving at a slow, un-hurried pace.

Photo credit: Janpietruszka, Dreamstime.com

It’s just… well… making the time for it!

Today, my world has conspired to enforce upon me, a Lazy Day. It is dreary and raining. Steady and heavy. The clouds are ominous. You know if you step out even for a minute, you’ll be soaked to the skin. The jammies are ever so comfortable and feel ‘right’ to remain on till afternoon, at which time you’ll contemplate whether it’s worth bothering, or more appropriate to remain puttering in your dressing gown till bedtime.

Lazy days are the epitome of luxury. So, abandon the chaos. Enter the stillness. Allow laziness to recharge your batteries. It heals the body. It soothes the mind. It brings peace to your Self, and that brings out your Beauty.

You don’t need an excuse, but Sunday rain is a good one. Indulge!

Lazy Days © June 12, 2011 | Annie Zalezsak

Let go to enjoy the ride!

For many years I have been following my ‘spiritual’ path, always looking for the meaning in everything inside and outside of myself. It has kept me very busy and I have learnt much about myself and the world in general. It has kept me company when I have been alone, like a companion who has so much in common with you and who cares about you. It has become a comfort!

However, that ‘comfort’ had also become a drag. So much time spent ‘looking’ that at times I missed such beautiful experiences that were with me right there and then. It had become another form of attachment, almost like a dark cloud hanging over me. Such a heaviness I carried, believing it to be part of the journey, part of the learnng experience. I became heavy, my conversations became heavy… I thought that this was how it should be on this spiritual path.

But today, lying in my glorious garden in the morning sun and listening to the birds and a family member singing in the bathroom, I realised that I need to let go of all the looking and the lessons. I need to let go of the heaviness and meanings.

After all, Life is just… life. It is meant to be lived, not sought. And so today, I have let go so that I can indeed enjoy the ride — the ride that this life actually is — fun, exhilerating and full of wonderful moments. Perfect!

Knowing and Walking

Knowledge is somewhat subjective. We could just say it’s all thought. Let’s suspend the analysis for a moment and presume there is a kind of supreme knowledge that is the ultimate truth of life. Let’s presume we have been enlightened to that knowledge: we know what it’s all about, what we’re here to do, how it all works. What then?

There is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path.
— Morpheus, in the film, The Matrix

 We may ‘know’ what the path is. Are we walking that path?

To know but not to do is not yet to know.
— Zen proverb

A life coach might say: take action! Yet, there are ideas (excuses?) around ‘divine timing’ and ‘allowing’ for the Universe to deliver ‘this, or something better’. We may ‘sit still’, wait to be ‘guided’ or ‘meditate on it’. We may be looking for the ‘flow’, the ‘signs’, or following our ‘intuition’.

It seems to me that thinking, believing and even knowing is not enough.
Walking. Therein lies Reality.

Walking involves Being, with every cell of the body, heart and soul, fully committed to something. It does not even matter what that ‘something’ is. What matters is full and complete engagement.

Until we Walk, do we really Know? Do we really Live?

Knowing and Walking © May 8, 2011 | Annie Zalezsak

In This Space

In this space where I AM now, there is no old
in this space where I AM now, there is wonder to behold.

In this space of who I AM, the eternal flows out before me
in this space of the All I AM, the moon and the stars enfold me!

Abundance of Beingness

When we focus on abundance, we tend to think about how much money we have, or what possessions we own. If our monetary and material assets are few, we believe that we are lacking in abundance. We can have millions of dollars, and we can lose it or give it away and be left with poverty. These things are transient and uncertain.

What if we reframed the reference of abundance to a meaning of what we ARE, rather than what we have? If I am at peace, it may be said I have an abundance of peace. If I am cheerful, I have an abundance of cheer. If I am loving, I have an abundance of love. If I am abundant in these things, I can give it all away, and I still have a never-ending flow. This makes us truly abundant!

True abundance has nothing to do with anything that I am having, and everything to do with what I am being. And that when I share my abundance of beingness abundantly with all those whose lives I touch, everything I sought to have came to me automatically, without my even trying to have them.

— Neale Donald Walsch

Experiment with the idea of BE-ing abundant, and focus on it rather than on ‘having’ abundance. When you do this, you may discover that ‘stuff’ matters comparatively little when you are being abundant. Notice how your life enriches!

Abundance of Beingness © February 21, 2011 | Annie Zalezsak

BEING Your Right Livelihood

As children, we’re asked: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” We may say: a fireman or a teacher, for example. These are labels that represent something we do, rather than what we are be-ing. A fireman fights fires and a teacher teaches. When we think of a job, career or even vocation, we often think of it in terms of what we do.

Neale Donald Walsch says:

So, the important thing for us to remember, when we’re searching for right livelihood, is to stop looking for something to do, and start looking for something to be. And to get in touch with that part that resides deep inside of you that knows who you really are. And see what it would take to call that forth in a beingness way.

When you meet someone new, you may say, “What do you do for a living?” We identify who we are by what we do. Is this a good thing? Or is this a misleading thing? What if we asked, “Who are you being?” I wonder how the reply might differ.

As someone who is still trying to figure out who I want to be when I grow up, I think it’s a good idea to take the word ‘be’ literally, and focus on that. That way, whatever I do is somewhat irrelevant. If my focus is on being, I can always be true to myself while doing any task.

BEING Your Right Livelihood © February 20, 2011 | Annie Zalezsak